Maria Grace Andrews, London, to the Saffery’s, Salisbury, [Wednesday], 18 April 1798.
Chapel Street April 18th 1798
My dear Papa, & Mama,
It is with yt pleasing confidence w:h ye Mind enjoys when reposing itself on parental indulgence yt I sit down to address you. At ye moment indeed, my heart beats with tumultuous anxiety, & my powers are enervated by recent conflict, but I cannot shrink back on ys Acc:t from writing to you as if it were a Task. On ye contrary I seek to it as a relief. Wd ys were more uniformly experienced in my addresses at a throne of Grace! –
Not to detain you longer in suspence I shall proceed to information. We rec.d ye parcel contain:g ye Letters &c perfectly safe as to ye Business w:h occasion’d yr subsequent Letter, while we are thankful at any rate yt it was ye means of procuring us more expeditious intelligence we are rather embarras’d as to ye reply. Dr Anne wishes to leave ye matter to yr conduct. Mr B [Blatch] might certainly I think come into ye House with little inconvenience at Midsummer but we do not like ye Idea of ye arrangement being generally known we judge it almost needless to observe yt no intimation of ye kind shd be given at Bratton you will know from what I have said yt delicasy is ye great difficulty in ye affair & yt after all I can say you must act as circumstances may require only taking care yt no one presumes to ascertain the time of our departure from L– Perhaps you are surprised that Anne does not take ye pen in order to adjust ye critical point of female policy – Alas her Mind has been distracted with cares wh I was going to say ought to be foreign to her present situation it is with reluctance I begin to explain ye nature of yt uneasiness I express’d myself ye subject of when I took ye pen – it will not surprise you when I mention Isleworth as ye Quarter from whence it proceeds. The day before Mr Whitaker left Town a Letter was dispatch’d by Mr A– in wh he requested us to lend him a few hundred pounds for about 3 months. Ye propriety of ye plan was refer’d to Mr Scott & Mr W– Anne was alone with Mr W– when ye curious Epistle was put into her hands. As I was quite poorly & extremely deprest at ye time they kept me in ignorance till ye next morn:g when Mr A had proposed to call. [With] all indecison & dismay we awaited his arrival he readily perceived it when he met us & ye Interview was so replete with confusion to all parties yt nothing was determined on. Hitherto Mr S– was altogether unacquainted with ye affair as we did not chose to throw ye < > of our refusal upon him & we had little reason to doubt his disapprobation on ye other hand Mr W– was of all Men ye most improper to decide his circumstances consider’g Anne was very desirous of preserving me from hazard by an offer of her own property. But ye Injustice of ys was so striking yt it was impossible for her to do it far less for me to admit of it with honor. Mr W–’s situation was particularly distressing to my feelings & I wd much rather have ventured on ye danger of lending mine than have seen him injured by allowing ys amiable injustice in my Sister – at length however Mr Scott was inform’d of ye dilemma & gave his vote for a decided refusal & especially judged it improper for Anne to accede to ye proposal – but I shall tire you with my tedious recital of particulars. I have only time to add yt after much debate both as to matter & manner a letter wh contains our refusal is at last tho not till yesterday dispatch’d in ys state of suspence & sorrow I sat down to write can you wonder that I pretend to write no other letters to S–? & will you forgive ye abruptness with wh I subscribe myself with ye sincerest Esteem & Love
your tenderly devoted Child,
Maria Grace Andrews
dr Anne unites in every sentiment & expression of respect & love – we beg suitable remembrances at S– Bratton– my love to Miss Attwater & dr Miss Davis will write to them soon if possible – tell Hannah to excuse my writing for ye present –
Text: Timothy Whelan, gen. ed., Nonconformist Women Writers, 1720-1840 (London: Pickering & Chatto, 2011), vol. 6, pp. 152-53 (annotated version); Saffery/Whitaker Papers, acc. 142, I.A.(12.), Angus Library. Address: Revd John Saffery, | Exeter Street, | Sarum | Wilts | April 18, 1798. Postmark: Mayfair, 19 April 1798. Both Maria and Anne were in London at the time of the above letter, staying with Thomas and Mary Scott in Chapel Street and not their father at Isleworth. Philip Whitaker accompanied the two sisters to London, but he had left by the time Maria composed the above letter. Reference above also to Joseph Blatch of Bodenham.